How to Win Friends and Influence People

This is Dale Carnegie’s summary of his book, from 1936
这是戴尔·卡耐基1936年的著作的一个概要。

 

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
与人相处的基本技巧

 

  1. Don't criticize, condemn or complain.
    不要批评、谴责或者抱怨。
  2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
    真心诚意地感激他人。
  3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
    唤起
    别人热切的需求。

 

Six ways to make people like you
使别人喜欢你的六个方法

 

  1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
    变得真正关心别人
  2. Smile.
    笑。
  3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
    永远记住,对一个人来说,在任何语言中最好听和最重要的声音是
    自己的名字
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
    做一个好的聆听者。鼓励别人对你讲述他们自己的事情。
  5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
    谈论别人感兴趣的事情。
  6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
    让别人感觉到他们自己很重要——但是要真诚。

 

Win people to your way of thinking
让别人认同你的想法

 

  1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
    尽量避免争论。
  2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
    尊重别人的观点。永远不要说“你错了。”
  3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
    如果你错了要迅速并且很郑重地承认。
  4. Begin in a friendly way.
    以友好的方式开头。
  5. Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
    快速地让别人说“是,是”。
  6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
    尽量让别人说话。
  7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
    让别人感觉到这个点子是他或她的。
  8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
    真诚地去站在别人的观点上看待事情。
  9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
    感受他人的想法与愿望。
  10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
    寻求高尚的动机。
  11. Dramatize your ideas.
    将自己的想法变得戏剧化。
  12. Throw down a challenge.
    放弃挑战他人。

 

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
成为领导者:如何改变他人而不冒犯他人或激起反感

A leader’s job often includes changing your people’s attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:
作为一个领导者你经常需要改变手下的态度和行为。下面是如何做好这些的一些建议:

  1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
    以表扬和真诚的感激开头。
  2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
    间接地指出别人的错误。
  3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
    在批评别人之前先谈谈自己的错误。
  4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
    不要直接命令而是通过问问题的方式。
  5. Let the other person save face.
    为他人保留面子。
  6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
    对很小的进步也提出表扬,并且对每一次进步都提出表扬。要诚恳地表示认可,慷慨地给予赞扬。
  7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
    给别人好的声誉使其为不负盛名而主动改进。
  8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
    鼓励他人,使错误看起来很容易纠正。
  9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
    让别人觉得乐于去做你让他做的事。

 

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